Little did I know then Jacki had her eye on me
We were there for work; it was a normal trade week
Evenings were less tame, late nights and plenty of cheek
A week together of bonding and fun oh and working
For Jean’s benefit (boss) it was very professional and no shirking.
So that was the start of this journey here to today
A week later, another show, we were back at play
This time in Telford the Commercial Vehicle show
What I was doing there I really don’t know
A night on the town and again lots to drink
Things were starting to happen, you know nudge nudge, wink wink.
So back to the hotel for the last drink of the night
I had a good feeling about this, something was right
So at the end of the evening Jacki picked up her bag
Back to my room I said fancy a ………
Chat (shame on you)
To continue with this theme would be ill fated
There are children and mums here and the rest is x rated.
The following Saturday and it’s our first proper date
It was a friends wedding as it happens, now you can call that fate
A wonderful venue on the outskirts of Henley
To our first dance together Angels, by Robbie…. Williams
So a couple now and a romantic weekend away
Off to Paris as a surprise style all the way
City of sights so which one did we rate
To us it was the place that hosted World Cup 98
A tour round the stade de France all spoken in French
A sneaky walk on the pitch and a sit on the bench
So the guide finished the tour and asked was there a question
What time does the restaurant close was my suggestion.
So only after a month I was already hooked
Engagement, wedding, honeymoon, all mentally booked
So our next adventure a holiday in Paradise
In the middle of the Indian Ocean, the Maldives to be precise
Two weeks of luxury on our Island Vaku
Sun… Sea…. Sand…. and there was something else to do
The last night though Jacki got a big shock
When she saw in our room a very big cock
roach
Within a few seconds there gathered a swarm
Must have been due to the impending storm
But I don’t want you to worry it was a small scare
Until a flying one emerged from under Jacki’s hair.
But I will stop the story there, as this is a happy day
And the psychiatrist confirms the nightmares would go away
So the story moves on to the Christmas Break
My mums or Jacki’s a decision to make
Which of the family’s were we going to approach?
The wrath of the mums, I ‘d prefer the Vaku cockroach
But Jacki is smart I am grateful, for us
Split the day into two she said what’s all the fuss
Then millennium celebration apart, which was not the plan
Jacki is in Dublin with Morri, Suzie and Sam
To a reveal a little secret not well known
I had a drunken proposal that night left on my phone.
So the scene is getting set for the romance in you all
Saturdurday May the 13th Padstow, Cornwall
The day was blistering hot the sun did not hide
So intelligently we took the Camel bike ride
The trail is from Wadebridge to the harbour at Padstow
I was beavering for a place to do it you know, the proposal
A perfect setting quick stop, any excuse for a fag
The ring, Ah yes ring back at the room in my bag
So all the way back to get the ring box
Where can I hide it my shorts or my socks
It must be a place where Jacki could not clock it
So it found its home in my left pocket
So for an uncomfortable 5 miles I could not divulge
What was causing my shorts to have this big bulge?
But the moment arrived and the answers was yes
And that is why Jacki’s sat here in that dress.
The next big event our engagement day was here
I was still hung over from the previous nights Guinness and Beer
Another hot day and the weddings getting nearer
A weekend to remember thanks to England’s Alan Shearer
Now the planning began for the big event
We knew from the start it would be money well spent
So my dilemma, the best man, who will take the floor
Most of you know them it’s one of four
Will it be Peter is that one fair?
No he is too funny and he has more hair
So Andy is next, hairs not the thing
But at Pete and Angie’s wedding he mislaid the ring
Now next there is Kevin, gray hair is OK
But Jacki wanted him as a bridesmaid for her special day
And last but not least, Kelly was free
But with Holly, India and Cameron Judy wouldn’t forgive me
So out of the four whom can I pick?
The answer was obvious best man, no chief chick
What can I say about this friend of ours
Apart from the obvious, best men don’t wear bras
So as you will have guessed she is not a guy
But friendship like this money can’t buy
We have known each other for 17 odd year
Met at college in Windsor in the heart of Berkshire
Our paths crossed originally in the form of a date
It soon became clear that friendship was our fate
A man could not get such a loyal close friend
Who parties like no other right up til the end?
Clarry give me a break next and don’t give away my life
Ah who care now, job done Jackis now my wife
So on to Jacki what can I say
Anything to risky and I will certainly pay
You are in my mind and my soul, so we will never be apart
You have my body and my life and now my heart, thank you
And so to the end of this attempt at my wedding rhyme
You will be pleased to hear its now Best Mans time
But before I sit and cringe at the rest
I can only relay what makes this the best
Apart from this whole day what makes this a delight
For once I am allowed to sleep with a married woman tonight.
No comments:
Post a Comment